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Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Informing Your Loved Ones That You Have Cancer

well i finally got around to telling my family that i have cancer. i didn't want to ruin their holidays so i waited until after to inform them of what was going on.
and, no, they do not read my blog...i didn't tell them i even had one. some things i like to write about and get my thoughts organized before my family knows. that's just the way i am:)
anywho, the questions for today are "how do you tell your loved ones that you are sick", and "do you actually let them know how you are coping with it"?
i guess honesty is the best policy but is that always true?
here's the situation:
when i e-mailed my sister and told her about my cancer coming back and the surgery, she told me that my mother has had heart problems and needs to see a cardiologist as soon as possible. my mother told her not to tell me because i "had enough on my plate". this of course is ridiculous! i thanked my sister for letting me know, but then thought, "i am a hypocrite". i withheld the information because i didn't want to worry them, but then i was upset when they withheld information from me for the same reason.
now, do i actually tell them that i have bouts of depression because of my cancer? or do i tell them i am doing fine and to not worry? would i want the truth from them even if i lie? where does hypocritical start and reassurance end?
it's interesting...i never thought of myself as a hypocrite in that sense, but i guess i are many people. after all, small lies to comfort someone is still, in fact, a lie.

so if doctors take the hippocratic oath, does that mean that the patients are entitled to the hypocritical one?

1 comment:

I.S. Differ said...

I think it might be a good idea to be as honest with your family as possible. That way, they can fully support you and empathize with what you're going through. You shouldn't have to suffer alone.....